Free speech is under assault! Not just the ability to say things, but also the ability to question what we should and shouldn't say. Of course, I'm talking about my open mic adventures! This time, I'm banned from an open mic just for asking why we weren't allowed to tell dick jokes. Keep in mind, this was an ad hoc rule the host decided to tack on after someone's set. This type of thing is bad for comedy. Where else but an open mic can comedians risk being unfunny in order to find what's funny? Censorship ensures that those risks are always second-guessed and is comedy contraception cockblocking laughter.
I love comedy. I'm talking a real love though, not an empty platitude on Valentine's Day candy. I'm talking about having to clean someone else's shit kind of love, which only seems to be appropriate with babies and animals, but here I am doing it for comedy. It's in the awkward moments where the fabric of social norms is whisked aside momentarily that I revel in. I recognize that perhaps I'm masochistic, but I've had enough therapy to realize that it's ok, it's totally appropriate in the context of standup comedy to ride that edge. Haha I sound like such a douchebag.
What's it gonna take? For what, you ask? FOR EVERYTHING!!!
Mass shootings, climate change, corruption in our media, government, health care system... just the whole thing through and through stinks of for-profit short-term bloodsucking and not the long-term rational action needed to deal with some really important things.
Meanwhile, there's good in this world, just because our media is run by "if it leads, it bleeds" parasites doesn't mean that's all there is to reality. Hug a loved one, and be grateful for what you have.
Roasting has permeated geopolitics! Is there no end to the roastification of the planet? You got your carbon heating things up but you also have viscous verbal barbs being slung willy-nilly, with no thought to the consequences. Many people believe the moment Trump decided to be President was when Obama roasted him at the White House Press Correspondence Dinner. Now Trump is President and is roast battling Kim Jong Un at the UN, and KJU responds with the D-bomb that had everyone shitting themselves. Meanwhile, is this what's important? Maybe. At least it's more important than football.
Living the life in Los Angeles! Can't complain, or can I? This is a rant cast, off the cuff, riffing hot licks, where I just go, no huddle. Thank you for your patience.
John and I were at one point sleeping on a twin size mattress on the basement floor of a Berkeley co-op called, Le Chateau, back during what historians may later call "The Critical Period." This was the late 90s, and we were at the intersection of many possible futures, many of them surely death or insanity, but lo and behold, we're now middle aged men back in LA, living out our dreams.
We had a wide-ranging and silly conversation, just a couple of valley boys shooting the shit.
It's been a while since I regaled you with tales from Roginia. I'm in between jobs and planes of existence. A brief trip though history, and we're in the present talking about the increase in humidity in LA. Not cool. The whole point was to get away from such things, but can you do? Demoisturize LA! I talk about a workout plan I've decided to try and stick to an reminisce about the time I was the most hated creature in all of New York City- the hurt able-bodied person taking forever to go down to the subway.
Apologies for the audio, I was talking into the mic like some kind of freak. I snuck away from my duties as a government agent in order to talk about the most important thing on my mind, my hair. We go from my hair to THE Hair to the Chief, and touch about how impeachment may be inevitable or just not happen, whatever! I like plants, by the way, one of my favorite plants is called the Wandering Jew, maybe because no matter how hard you try to kill it, it ends up running global finance!
Lots of dong waggling going on in the Korean peninsula, and I waggle my own dong, my history dong, and explore the history of the Konflict between the two Koreas. I then surreptitiously slip in a discussion about stealthing and then onto a recent scientific discovery that allows us to sift ancient hominid DNA from cave floors. What does this all mean? Does it have to mean anything? Yes, but only because we're compelled too. I really have no answers! Anybody who says they do is automatically suspect.
In this episode, I rant about walls. The government neared shutting down because of the Border Wall, but what's in a wall? Do they really work? How crazy is it that we annexed what was once Mexico, fought a war over it, promised dual citizenship, reneged on the promise, use Mexicans as cheap labor, blame them for our troubles, and then tell them we want to build a wall that won't really work? Beyond physical walls, we have the metaphorical walls that we construct to make sense of the world- us vs them, red team vs blue team, Coke vs Pepsi... But when will we learn to drop all our walls and accept that we are all just people?
This episode of the Kimcast, I have my cousin Han Kim. He has a podcast called In The Kimchi Jar. He's also runs shit in the poogmul world, as well as spreading the teachings and philosophy of Dosan Ahn Chang Ho. We tried to keep the conversation on track about depression, and we talk about our own experiences with it as well as how we coped and the treatment that we sought. We talk about the times we wanted to kill myself, which for me was all part of a terrible "acid" trip that left me trapped in a another dimension looking to fuck my way back. We inevitably talk about our fucked up families and our hopes for the future. All in all, this was a great conversation with a terrific podcaster in his own right.
Flat Earth again!?!?!? Yes, it raises it's stupid head again, this time with Kron Gracie, who I highly respected as a martial artist, but now not so much as an astrophysicist, but that's only fair. We can't all have a grasp of the universe can we? It's more an indictment of our education system if anything. Science, bitch.
I have a job now! I'm on my lunch break! I'm in a car! This is fine! I'm pondering on the need for some structure to this podcast, but then would mean I have to put in more work and effort, meaning less podcasts overall? Maybe less is more, unless it's not, then it's less and more is more. In this episode, I talk about how it's St. Patrick's Day, how the State Dept. has been gutted, the irony of a guy who wrote "The Art of The Deal," trying to defund the arts, Rex Tillerson aka Wayne Tracker, and a little sign-posting on some book reports I'd like to do in the future.
I'm tired of Trump, so I'm taking a much needed Trump dump. Enough talk about politics, let's get back to me. This episode I ruminate on famliy. Part of leaving LA when I was a kid was all about leaving my family and abandoning my dad the same way he's abandoned me. I've since grown older, wiser, done a shit ton of psychedelics, and had a shit ton of analysis in order to find myself here, back in LA having to ask my dad for money, and having to work for it. He helped me see both a reflection of myself and of himself at my age. Hmmm... maybe this episode is too real? Not for me! It's exactly the right amount of real.
Another crazy week! This podcast is a bit late because I was working on my NEW INTRO! I'll be back on track in no time. In this episode I talk abut the Muslim travel ban, whether it was a botch-up or strategic chaos, how Trump is viewed through different filters a la Scott Adams, and how we are manipulated because our monkey brains are more in control than our so-called logical brains.
We're a week into the Trump Administration and the Doomsday Clock has gotten two and a half minutes closer to midnight! Hooray for us! Now is the time to exercise the right to assembly guaranteed by the First Amendment before it get repealed, so I went to the Women's March in Downtown LA. I love protests and marches! Movements like labor, suffrage, and civil rights were all instrumental in making sure that I didn't end up the angriest waiter in America. What about punching Nazis? Does freedom of speech mean that you should not be punched for being a Nazi? Idealistically, yes. Realistically, no.
Just look at him. You know he wants that dong from Hong Kong. He's definitely jerked it to Enter the Dragon while imagining Bruce Lee's hot yellow rod up his, SURVEY SAYS... ass. The survey says ass.
Steve Harvey underwent some controversy this past week by making jokes about dating Asian men, namely, that nobody wants to. Eddie Huang responded in suit and hey, he did a great job so that the rest of us don't have to struggle with articulating some shit we need to move past. If anything, I have to thank Steve Harvey for the title, which is the premise of a bit I'm going to be working out on stage for my upcoming show at Fubar in West Hollywood 1/27 8pm. It's going to be really gay, both the bit and the venue.
I talk about Steve Harvey meeting Trump at Trump Tower, which has a very LOTR feel to it, no? I land briefly on Steve Harvey's comments, only to segue into a riff about asian masculinity. What is it? Is it Bruce Lee? Chances are for most of you, it's Bruce Lee. I challenge Steve Harvey to talk shit about Bruce Lee and see how far he gets!
We go deeper into the wormhole, take a pic of Metaphysics Gulch, and then I ponder the reality of my own existence... Am I just a cheap Asian facsimile of Joe Rogan? Could I ever live out my dreams of becoming Asian Joe Rogan? Would the UFC try to slip me in his place and try to pull the wool over everyone's eyes? Considering this week started off with MLK Day and ends with Trump's inauguration, I'd say that even though it sounds like bad writing, it's the good life!
Twelve days in and I finally address the new year! Let's start it off with The Cranberries, Ode to my Family, because I'm unemployed, or self-employed rather, and staying in an Air BnB in gorgeous Park La Brea, which is basically the immigrant middle class projects filled with cockroaches and immigrants!
It's 2017, dammit, and I've stayed off the radar. I recount watching Trump get elected at The Comedy Store and making eye contact with Joe Rogan, who I saw being a real good dude. He's definitely the reason I have a Vitamix. I feel I saw a glimpse of his true character, which I believe is revealed under adversity or when anonymous.
Son then there's Trump. Would the first woman president be just as big a liar as all the rest? I then go into a dank hole of pepe, kek, meme magic, /pol/, 4chan, army of darkness, internet culture, chaos, frogs, tribalism, and the lulz.
The final analysis- every single tribe is shitty and great. Look, we're all people. It doesn't matter if you're woke or red pilled, we're all gonna die. Entropy wins in the end. Even if we became immortal, the sun will swell and destroy theEarth.
We construct meaning as finite creatures, but we're selfish. What if we found out that Earth's existence was causing the deaths of two other planets, would we sacrifice ourselves for them? Is it cynical to think we're just self-interested monkeys? On the other hand, what do I know? What the fuck is dark energy and dark matter?
When I first left LA, I couldn't wait to get out of here. Now, this place ain't so bad. Winter in LA is adorable. We are lucky and in the sweet spot of civilization. Best contribution of 2016- 'member berries from South Park.
It's Election Day Eve and both sides are likening tomorrow's results as the harbinger of Armageddon, but that's soooo dramatic! Come on, you really think everything's going to change? Do you think the President has that much power? When was the last time a President delivered what the candidate version himself said just a year earlier? There's a lot of pillow talk that happens before someone's elected, but afterward, it's business as usual. Too bad that business is war.
Marijuana legalization is on the the ballot in California and eight other states. Let's make the union green! The War on Drugs is a racist and authoritarian criminalization of black nationalists and anti-war protestors in the 70s. We have a chance to make some real money in California and stop letting Colorado make us look bad. I mean Colorado is great, I love it, I love the people, the mountains, I really do, but it's the Khloe to our Kim. Let's be real. We can't keep sitting on the sidelines letting Khloe get all the press and all the cheddar! There is the off chance that the economy could crash because high people would be less susceptible to advertising, but we mustn't let the best become the enemy of tho good.